Back in Step - Hopefully Forward

If anyone hasn't noticed . . . my blog has been a bit of an event calender for duroos . . . They are easy to put up. Cut, paste and publish. But i do have something on my mind that I have been avoiding . . . after six months, my oldest bint, Ms. Mofsa, who has been overseas with her Umm is coming back, insha'Allah. I love her dearly and I have invested a lot in developing our relationship, but "blended families are hard." I put this in quotes, because my friend always reminds me of this fact.
Some people say when the "blend" is done early in the child's life it's easier. The child get used to the step-mom, being away from Mom and going back and forth. But this works, but the parents have to want it to work. But there have been so many schedule changes, moves and rules that I think between she and I (my Mofsah) we were becoming batty. By the time she left in August, she and I were sort at odds, for no reason other than, we both wanted, needed stability. Also, as a result the little'un were suffering as well.
I will welcome her back with open arms, but with a new plateform. Which I will present to her father soon, when I get my nerve up . . . I am borrowed this from my friend (another step-umm). This is how it goes . . .
Mofsah is six and now that she is in school (home school/islamic school not decided yet) she needs a stable environment so that she can concentrate on her education and development. This means that she needs to reside in one home and visit her other family on weekends (maybe not every') and on holidays. This is not a plot to keep her away from (her mom or dad), but to provide her with a sense of security, so that she isn't always being caught in the shuffle of adjusting to different environments all the time. Yes, it will be difficult for her to be away from (a parent), but she has been away from a least one parent several times and has coped. But remember in this home she has a father, a step-mom, siblings and extended family that love her as does she have a mom, step-father, siblings and extended family that love her. So she will be in a nuturing environment no-matter whose house she lives in permenantly. Of course the ideal situation is for a child to live with both birth parents, but since that isn't an option this is the next best thing.
How does that sound?
Make dua for me, please!