You Gotta Have Skillz!

No! I am not talking about light saber skillz. Geesh! I am refering to wife skills, come on akhwati!
6 years ago, before I was married, I spent maybe a week with my oldest muslim friend, (masha'Allah that is like an eternity in revert years) and in those few days I learned so much about what it really means to be a muslim wife. Of course, I had all those common books on muslim marriage, but actually seeing a women being obedient to her husband and seeing the tranguility of it all was really stunning (in ways than one). Back then, she was a stay-in-the-house-aint' driving-nowhere, mom! Like that was totally alien to me.
Prior to my visit, I had all these plans to go back to school, get a job and build and empire, lol (who knows of what) all the while married. In her gentile way, she questioned me - no lectures, but with simple passive statements. Basically, she told me all that is impossible with a husband and kids. At least if you want do it well. We can't build our skillz from our Jaahil ideals.
So for a week, we were house wives together. We cooked, cleaned, read islamic books and dressed little boys (me putting on the wrong outfits, geesh when you have them so close together how do know whose socks are whose?) After that week, I was forever changed.
Now as a 5 year veteran at the house wife/ homeschooling ummie, I am building up my skillz bank. And everyday, I add new ones to the already exisiting ones. I still have ones that are still undiscovered, epecially in the area of effective communication. I come from a house of long winded/low-talkers and my husband comes from a tribe of shortwinded/holla'ers, so I am trying to bridge the gap. So we are still trying to find our inside voices, so to speak.
Wifee skillz help us cope and really they force us to combine of what we know from the Haqq about the role of the wife and what we come to discover about our hubbies over time. A good source of skillz can come from our mother-in-laws, if you can try and establish a relationship with them (only if they aren't totally majnoon). A good mom-in-law relationship can give clues to the clueless. Secondly, learn about the rights/roles of the wife and the husband. Take a dive into the Sunnah, check out hadeeths related to marriage, read about the Rasool Allah salaatu wa salaam and his wives. Read about the women of Medina. And the read the book pictured above. Alhamdulillah, it has been translated in English. These skillz can possibly keep you from the FIRE!